making mountains out of molehills.
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the ultimate boob lift—without the boob lift
photo via dailymail uk
perhaps if sheyla hershey had waited a few years for this latest invention in lingerie, she wouldn’t find herself in the predicament she’s in now.
billed as a boob lift without the boob lift, ultimo has unveiled its latest line, icon, “thought to be among the most technologically-advanced underwear in the world— contains a secret sling hidden within the cup, to create maximum uplift, while the inclusion of microscopic fibers and compressed foam, work to achieve optimum shape and contouring,” as kelly brook so coquettishly models above.
its creators claim it to be one of the most lightweight and comfortable bras
“in the world—women won’t even know they are wearing it.” marketed toward women of all ages, its design works to create a “youthful, shapely silhouette.” you know, because “youthful” and ”shapely” are the only acceptable looks women’s breasts should take in order to be considered attractive. “it works to prevent younger breasts from sagging,” explains michelle mone, creator of the new age bra. “and for women who already have saggy boobs, it uplifts the breasts in an instant to the perky pair they once were, making the breasts look up to ten years younger just like a boob lift.”
just because you cut the knife out of the equation doesn’t mean you subtract the vanity, too.
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